Wednesday, 7 January 2009

Ikea


It's interesting what objects you carry on duty and never use - and others that you use that before joining you woudn't have thought about carrying.

Recently my most used piece of kit has been my Ikea Family Card.


NOT - as some might think - because there is a large Ikea store on my patch and with the Ikea card I get free tea and coffee.

NOT because I like to do a little light shopping for matresses whilst on my refs break.

But when I have to scrape the ice of my windscreen (again), it's simply the best.

162 comments:

Zed said...

Most people boast that credit cards are best for that sort of thing.

a) I've never owned a credit card
b) I don't own a car. Or drive.

Lola Snow said...

You forgot the disclaimer:

"Obviously there are other store cards available and equally sound to conduct this task, and this post is by no means a recommendation or guarrantee of success when using this card in the line of duty. For officer safety please complete requiste online training manuals per26z and WNKe1 before attempting to deice your vehicle"

Lola x

Vetnurse said...

ROFLMAO @ Lola

Julian Meteor said...

New trousers please, Lola!!!!!!
P.M.S.L.

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Noddy said...

I use one of the handy plastic covered handouts about some tosh that ends up in my tray periodically.

They also double up for another use at tenement blocks the answer to which which is hidden in the name of the firm you are advertising!

TonyF said...

:-) Lola Please stop, it hurts when I larff....

Hogday said...

Re Lola's funny; One of my bikes is a Harley and the Americans lead the way in litigation-avoiding-cover-my-arse-disclaimers. This is a typical example:

"Failure to fit the headlight bulb correctly could result in light failure during darkness which may result in death or serious injury". I kid you not! The manual is 3 times as thick as it needs to be because of this stuff. Maybe I'll dig it out and post a few.

RedHillian said...

Good call - the RAC membership card a few years ago was top for this, but I might have to get an Ikea card just for this very reason.

Bridge said...

Oyster cards are good for that too, especially when they do a free giveaway for the local chav population to try and encourage more of them to vandalise the capital's buses.

In fact, it's the duty of all law-abiding citizens to deny the Evil Poor their free Oyster cards by ordering as any of them to use as ice scrapers as you can. It'll save Transport for London a fortune in replacement windows and seats.

R/T said...

Here's a good 'un (and true). I worked in a nick a while back where the CPO stuck an encapsulated A4 sheet on the wall describing lyrically and pictorially how the shitbags were using a plastic 2 litre pop bottle to facilitate entry to Yale-locked doors. It was very interesting! However - the funny happened when a PC stuck the following on the sheet - "I've tried the pop bottle trick and it's shit. However - this plastic encapsulated sheet worked fine and did the job in seconds. Thank you!"

Made me laugh anyway!

afriendlyface said...

In the less time-pressured world of civil enforcement, we just leave the cars running for a few minutes while we have a cup of tea.

Anonymous said...

I just turn on the heated front windscreen on my Focus!

Smug Bus tard

TheBinarySurfer said...

Don't lie ATNS - we know it's all about the free tea & bun!

Captain Slow said...

I use my Federation Membership Card to clear my windscreen.

"gunner" said...

handy suggestion, we do get a bit of snow hereabouts, a couple of feet on the ground at the moment and more over the horizon. i've been away, so glad to see you all still sitting up and taking nourishment.
"gunner"

Lola Snow said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
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